Whole30

Well, I managed to sail through the holidays.

I knew I would be doing the Whole30 immediately following Christmas, so I was doing my best to adhere to the program for the weeks prior, so it wouldn't be so hard when I officially started.

I had a couple of "bad" meals right around Christmas, but I wasn't about to turn a bad meal into a bad day...  So, I just did the best I could with every situation, enjoyed the holiday and moved on.  Overall, I am very happy with how I ate during the holidays.

I have to post this picture of Josh and I on Christmas Eve...  This photo says a lot, it really does.  First off, my husband has a bad back, and secondly - there is just no way he would have even attempted this last year - or any other year...

Looking at this picture really makes me see how far I have come.  I don't look spectacular up there or anything, but just the fact that I was up there in the first place...  It's just a HUGE accomplishment for me, and for Josh. ;)  And our poor Max, was very worried that his Momma was up there.  It's just a great picture, and one that I love!

Moving on...

Our holiday was spent with family and friends...  Overall, it was a great holiday.  I was able to spend it with the people I love the most, and that is the most important part.  Of course, there were a few people missing - but we had a great time and enjoyed ourselves.

A picture of my "kids" on Christmas Eve...  My oldest daugther and her boyfriend, my youngest daughter and our dog.  My oldest daughter says I am creepy because I think of her boyfriend as one of my other kids - but oh well...  He is here so much, I am just used to him being around.  So, she just can just deal with it.  :) 

A few other random pictures from the holidays...

My oldest daughter and I on our way to visit my Dad.

And my It Starts with Food book - which arrived a few weeks prior to Christmas, just in time for me to dig in and make my holiday a little less bad.  :)

 

 

Then - Allison, her boyfriend, me and Victoria playing Monopoly on New Years Eve...  We had to take pictures of the game board and pack it up to resume another day.  As usual - Monopoly goes on forever.  But we all had a great time, I think.  :)

 

And then, my kitchen...  A week prior to Christmas, I had the brainy idea to redo our floors.  They were driving me nuts.  Which turned into, redoing the floors, then we needed new trim, then we decided to make our coat closet (not pictured) deeper, and put a new basement door in.  This is still a work in progress, as you can see in the above photo...  with the excess trim in the background.  :)  But it looks so much nicer, Josh is doing a great job with it!

 

 

So, that's all for Holiday stuff.

Now, I am starting Day 6 of my Whole30...  I am still pretty excited about it.  I am not sure what is going on, but I am not having many of the symptoms/side effect of the "typical Whole30"... I am not sure if it's because I was doing my best to be compliant for a few weeks prior?  Or if it's because I've been eating Primally for the last year, so the amount of "stuff" I had to give up with this was pretty minimal?  Whatever it is, my Whole30 seems to be going very well, and I am really liking it.  I am sure that's about to change, as boredome sets in...  But I am already feeling great and I am even seeing some nice size loss.  I know my measurements/weight will be a little scewed when I am finished with this 30 days, since I didn't weigh/measure at the beginning of it.  But I am definitely seeing a visual difference in myself this early in the game, which makes me quite happy.

 

I am also back to my regular workout/lifting routine after the holidays.  To be honest, I only missed 2 scheduled work outs during that time...  Both days because I was sick.  So, I am feeling good on that front too.

I have big dreams and goals for this Whole30...  Of course, I want my size loss...  It is my "ultimate goal" to be a solid size 8 by the time summer hits, and judging by the way I am going now, I do think it's doable.  I am also hoping this W30 gives me better control over my food choices - especially my morning coffee habit (something I've been struggling with for a while now).  I am on day 6 of "black coffee" with only adding cinnamon for a flavor boost.  It's pretty awful, but each day is better and better - so I guess that's progress?  I am also anxious to see what other things my body has in store for me - the things I didn't think about, or I didn't know I needed to.  And to be honest, I kind of hope I am able to stick with this longer than 30 days, I enjoy it enough that I think it's something I could carry forward with.  Who knows?  I am only on Day 6...  I might change my mind in 15 more days? 

I hope that everyone has a nice New Year, I hope all of you are finding ways to change your lives in a meaningful way that's sustainable for a lifetime.  :)

D~

It's been a while...

I guess I am not the best blogger in the world.  :)

I don't have much to update.  I am still here and still moving in the right direction.

I feel like I am doing well through these hard holiday weeks, and I don't feel like I am falling off of the wagon, which is good.  My focus seems to be pretty clear.

Part of my success, this holiday season, is that I am planning to do a Whole30 immediately following Christmas.  To prepare myself for that, I've been trying really hard to conform to those guidelines in advance...  Which means, I am really trying to eliminate as much of my sugar intake as I can during this time.  I am not trying to be perfect, I am just trying to make it easier on myself later.  This seems to be working well for me, as I don't do well on an all or nothing sort of diet anyways...  Likely, when I do my Whole30, I will have to do it with a few variations...  I know that is not the spirit of the Whole30, but I need to be able to do what works for me.

This last weekend was our 17th wedding anniversary, so Josh took me out to a gorgeous turn-of -the-century hotel...  We had the most fabulous time!  We learned that we really need to take time for ourselves every once in a while - it's good for our marriage.  Sadly - we don't do this often enough, and we know that, time just has a way of passing us by...  But, it still amazes me, how I can fall in love, over and over again with the same man...  Love and life are truly great!

The reason I mentioned the above...  I was feeling great, all dressed up for our dinner - my oldest daughter did my make-up and I did my hair - I felt good about myself.  I am wearing a solid size large in almost everything - I do have a few mediums thrown in.  :D

The following morning, I took a few pictures of myself in our hotel room mirror, and I was a little shocked at how I looked.  I don't feel like I've lost much size since our Disney trip in August - but I do think these pictures might disagree with me.  I do look different and smaller. 

(And please ignore the weird way I am standing - I am not trying to do that pigeon toed stance that's popular with the young girls these days...  The tiles were really cold on my bare feet - that is all.  LOL)

It's just really fun for me, to see how my body is changing.  Everyone continues to tell me that I am looking younger and younger as the days go on...  I must admit - I am starting to get a bit of an ego.  ;)  But it shocks me to look in a full-body mirror like this, and not see the person I am used to seeing standing there.

D~

First round of Holiday festivites, complete!

It's been a while since I have checked in here... 

It was kind of crazy over the holiday weekend with food prep, food eating and shopping - plus work.  But we survived and we had fun.

I did weigh and mesure yesterday (I guess it was really brave for me to weigh and measure immediately following a holiday weekend like that), for the first time since the end of September - I can't say that I am thrilled with the results, but they aren't bad - so I will take them.  I just feel like I am so stalled out, at this point, I am just going to try to coast through the holidays and maintain (like I did last year - but I'd be thrilled if I lost), then I will try to refocus after - and really commit to getting rid of these last few sizes.

Ok - so officially - I am down another 3.6, for a grand total of 63.4 lbs. -.25 forearm, -.25 neck, -1.25 waist, -1.5 navel, -.25 hips. Everything else stayed the same.

Looking at my progress photos from this summer, there really isn't any change at all.  But looking at the bigger picture, there is a lot of progress, so I really need to focus on that part of it.

Anyways...

There is just so much work left for me to do.  I don't aspire to be society's idea of perfect in any way, but I'd really like to be comfortable in my own skin, and I just don't feel like I am there yet.

D~

Still here...

And still chugging along...

Still eating like I should.

Still excercising like I should.

Still lifting weights like I should.

Still taking days off like I should.

Still enjoying life like I should.

I am feeling good going into the holidays.  With Thanksgiving approaching, I am very excited for that meal.  And since we are not hosting this year - there will be no leftovers to tempt me for days afterwards.  However, I am trying to talk Josh into making a mini-Thanksgiving meal for us, so we can have some of our favorites too.  We'll see...

I work on Black Friday - like I do every year.  Our holiday meal is Chipotle - Yay!!!  It's one of the few places I allow myself to eat these days...  It may not be perfectly Primal - but it's better than many others out there.  I just consider it my 20% and move on.

I am going shopping with my neighbor on Saturday - this is an annual thing for us, and we have so much fun.  We alternate years, one of us drives and the other pays for lunch.  I think we look forward to a nice lunch out more than anything.

Then on Sunday, we will probably go out and cut our tree - like we do every year.

Looking forward to the holidays this year!

D~

I haven't weighed or measured yet...

And I am a little afriad to.

I was so busy around Halloween - I just forgot to do my end of the month stuff.  And here I am, a good third into the next month - telling myself I might as well wait now.

I do feel like I am getting smaller though.  I see pictures of myself, and I feel like I am looking better & fitter - so I think progress is being made.

I went shopping last week to find something to wear for Thanksgiving this year...  I found a dress I really like a lot.  I love how it gives me a nice hourglass shape - eventhough I am wearing jeans under it vs. the tights I plan to wear.  So, that's a bonus.  :)  I am really excited to dress up this year and feel good about myself.

 

 

However, while in the fitting room, I had an experience I've never had before...  I tried on several items and I really liked everything on me.  That has never happened!  I've always gone into fitting rooms, just praying I can get the items on and almost always leaving with tears because nothing looks right.  To go into a fitting room and have the problem of loving everything I tried on - well, I was not expecting that at all.  It's quite strange, and I wasn't sure what to do about it.  So, I did what every person does now-a-days, and I took pictures to let my friends decide.  That was kind of fun. 

 

Now, the next struggle...  What to wear for Christmas?  LOL  I just love being able to dress up and feel good.  This is such a new thing for me.

D~ 

Halloween fun...

Which has nothing to do with my journey to better health...

But it was fun - and something I worked on all week, so I am sharing it. 

I woke up on Monday with a Post-It note on my computer...  My girls know, if they want anything done - this is the best way to make sure I see it.  Sad, I know.

The Post-It had a list of costume requirements...  Allison and her boyfriend had decided to be Mickey and Minnie for Halloween...  Which means...  I needed to get to work.

So, all week long, in the off hours of my work days, I was sewing and creating their costumes.  I guarantee - if they had chosen anything, but Disney - I would not have been as passionate about it. 

But they chose Disney, and I was in my glory!

I started off making Allison's skirt... And she was thrilled with how it turned out! Which, in my life, never happens. Big time score for Mom. Whoohoo!

Then, I came up with a brilliant idea for their shirts...  But there was just no way I could get them done on time if I did them by hand.  So, I did an SOS call on Facebook, and one of my very talented digitizer friends (Heather of froufroubyheathersue.com) did a last minute favor (Thanks Heather) and digitized my idea!  I was soooo excited - because this pulled everything together for me.  Score again!

Since this was a new design, and no one had ever stitched it before - I had to test it before I put it on their shirts...  So this took a lot of time too. 

Aside from that...  I was shopping all week, looking for items to complete Gus' outfit...  It was kind of crazy - but the end result was totally worth it! 

 

The kids were thrilled, and they had a great time. And I got to do some fun Disney sewing! Life is good!

Looking forward to next year - as Allison is cooking up another Disney theme.  <3

D~

The mirror...

I still struggle a lot with how I see myself.

Some days, I look in the mirror and see who I was.

Some days, I look in the mirror and see who I am.

And some days, I look in the mirror and see who I want to be.

I think a lot of people struggle with this...  I am certain I am not alone.

I believe, a person really needs to be able to see all 3 to keep themselves moving in the right direction.

When I see the person I was, sometimes it motivates me and sometimes it makes me feel ashamed.  Even though I am no longer that person - I still remember the hopelessness I felt, and that constant instinct to hide.  I always felt as if I was doomed to live that life forever, trapped in a body that wasn't my own...  I see pictures from that time, and I often wonder how I lived like that?  How and why did I let it happen?  But this motivates me to push harder to achieve my goals, and concentrate on eating what makes me feel healthy and good.

When I see the person I am, I struggle a lot with seeing how far I have come and how far I have left to go.  It's not often I see both at the same time.  I am getting closer and closer every day to an undefined goal, and I am really proud of myself for that! 

When I see the person I want to be, I know that I am not there yet.  But I know I can do it...  I realize that I am strong enough to continue on.  I know this journey has given me so much more than size loss and will continue to do so.

There comes a time, though - when it's not will power or motivation that keeps me going...  It's the fact that I have changed my life so drastically, and the changes I have made are now effortless...   It's not even a matter of this lifestyle being a struggle - it's not.  I really enjoy this, and I enjoy who I've become, the body I have taken back, and the health I've gained.  There is no going back, I can never imagine myself as that person again.

D~